You probably know Peter Piper, famed picker of peppers, from the children’s nursery rhyme:
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled Peppers:— Peter Piper
Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled Peppers?
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled Peppers,
Where’s the peck of pickled Peppers Peter Piper picked?
But did you know that Peter Piper is actually just the “P” in a sequence of A-Z nursery rhymes that ends with Peter assaulting X, Y, and Z?
Here’s A, for Andrew Airpump:
Andrew Airpump ask’d his Aunt her ailment;— Peter Piper
Did Andrew Airpump ask his Aunt her ailment?
If Andrew Airpump ask’d his Aunt her ailment,
Where was the Ailment of Andrew Airpump’s Aunt?
And here’s M, for Matthew Mendlegs:
Matthew Mendlegs miss’d a mangled Monkey— Peter Piper
Did Matthew Mendlegs miss a mangled Monkey?
If Matthew Mendlegs miss’d a mangled Monkey,
Where’s the mangled Monkey Matthew Mendlegs miss’d?
If you feel bad for the mangled monkey, just look at what happened to X, Y, and Z!
X Y and Z have made my brains to crack-o:— Peter Piper
X smokes, Y snuffs, and Z chews tobacco;
Yet oft by X Y Z much learning’s taught,
But PETER PIPER, beats them all to naught.